I WILL ADMIT IT CONFUSES ME A BIT AS AT TIMES I DON’T FEEL LIKE I HAVE MUCH TO GIVE THANKS FOR, BUT THEN I SEE SOMEONE WHO IS WHERE I WAS YEARS AGO WHEN I WAS STILL ON DOPE AND I REALIZE THAT THANKSGIVING COVERS ALL OF THE ABOVE. I MUST BE THANKFUL AT THE VERY LEAST FOR THE WONDERFULLY WARM NEW BOOTS I WAS GIVEN AT THE AGAPE CHURCH WHEN I WENT THERE TUESDAY TO SHOWER-AND THE COAT, BLANKET AND GLOVES I WAS GIVEN WERE ALL THINGS TO BE THANKFUL FOR  BUT THE SHOWER-THAT WAS ONE THING I HAVE TO GIVE THANKS FOR AS I HAD BEEN CLEANING UP SOME PRETTY NASTY STUFF AND THE SHOWER ACTUALLY MADE ME TIRED!   I LEFT THE CHURCH WITH MY NEW BOOTS, BLANKET AND HEAVY SOCKS AND REALISED YOU DO NOT HAVE TO HAVE A FAMILY NEARBY OR HAVE A SINGLE FRIEND -LIKE ME- TO CELEBRATE THANKGIVING.  SOMETIMES I AM THE ONE DOING THE GIVING AND OCCASIONALLY I AM ON THE RECIEVING END -BUT EVEN BY MYSELF IN MY LITTLE RV WITH NOT A FRIEND TO TURN TO-I FELT THANKFUL.  NO I DID NOT HAVE A TURKEY DINNER WITH A FAMILY OR ONE OF THE COMMUNITY DINNERS-I FELT THANKFUL JUST TO STILL BE SUCKING WIND AND I FELT THANKFUL FOR MEETING MY DEAD FRIEND BOBBY GANT BEFORE HE WAS KILLED AND I FELT THANKFUL FOR THE STRENGTH OF CHARACTER IT TOOK ME TO QUIT ALL THE BOOZE, DOPE AND PEOPLE ASSOCIATED WITH DRUG USE IN GENERAL.  IF I DID NOT HAVE THESE QUALITIES-I WOULD MOST LIKELY BE DEAD-MY DRUG USE LEFT ME WITH SOME VERY NASTY BLOOD DISEASES-OR I WOULD BE LIKE THE PEOPLE I WITNESSED ASKING TO GO INTO A HALFWAY HOUSE AS THE WINTER WASHERE FINALLY.  THIS IS SOMETHING I HAVE SEEN YEAR AFTER YEAR- THE SNOW COMES AND THE HOMELESS JUNKIES AND DRUNKS ALL DECIDE TO QUIT DOING THEIR DRUG(S) OF CHOICE SO THEY CAN GET A WARM BED AND OF COURSE-THEY ALWAYS FAIL BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT DONE WITH DRINKING AND DOPING YET-YOU COULD ALMAST PUT A NEW CATEGORY IN THE ALMANACS ABOUT WHEN THE HOMELESS WILL START ASKING FOR HELP WITH HOUSING…  SEE THERE IS SOMETHING MOST DO NOT KNOW-ANY THING YOU WANT TO CHANGE ABOUT YOURSELF OR YOUR LIFE-ALMOST ALL OF IT IS UNDER YOUR CONTROL-YOU CAN JUST DECIDE TO STOP AND STICK TO THE DECISION, FOR ME IT TOOK LOOKING DEATH STRAIGHT IN THE EYE AND DECIDING I WAS NOT READY TO GO OUT A DOPE FIEND FOUND DEAD WITH A RUSTY RIG HANGING OUT OF MY ARM.  I LITERALLY RAN FROM DEATH WITH HIM ON MY ASS HOT AND HARD TRYING TO PULL ME BACK DOWN.  I WAS MORE AFRAID OF DEATH THAN I WAS OF POLICE!!~!  THAT DEATH THING-IS NOT UNDERRATED, IT HURTS!  EITHER WAY- I WAS LIKE A LIGHTBULB AT MENTAL HEALTH- THE JOKE IS:HOW MANY PSYCHIATRISTS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHTBULB?  ONLY ONE-BUT THE LIGHTBULB HAS GOTTA WANT TO CHANGE…OF COURSE LIGHTBULBS DO NOT HAVE ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE TO DECIDE WHETHER TO CHANGE THEIR PLACE INTHE WORLD BUT QUITTING DOPE IS JUST LIKE THE BURNT BULB’S SITUATION-YOU GOTTA BURN OUT-ENOUGH SO THAT YOU NO LONGER WANT TO BE IN WHATEVER FIXTURE YOU ARE IN-AND THROW THAT WHOLE ASITUATION AWAY.  I LEFT ARIZONA AFTER BEING THE VICTIM OF A SEX CLUB ASSOCIATED WITH THE VFW, AFTER THEY WERE DONE WITH WHATEVER GAL THEY WERE ABUSING-THEY WOULD OVERDOSE THEM ON SOME KIND OF MENTAL MEDICATION-FOR ME THEY CHOSE LITHIUM.   THIS DRUG IS ONE OF THE WORST  TO BE DOSED WITH AND MY ONLY RECOURSE WAS TO LEAVE EVERY SINGLE THING I OWNED BEHIND ME AND RUN TO SOMEPLACE I DID NOT HAVE A DOPE COOK AT MY BECK AND CALL-AND I DID THAT-I RAN FOR MY LIFE AND BECAUSE I AM ONE OF THE PEOPLE WITH A STRONG ENOUGH CHARACTER TO DO THIS-I AM ALIVE TODAY.  NOT ONLY AM I ALIVE TODAY, I ALSO GOT THE RIGHT TO VOTE BACK, EVEN THOUGH I AM A 3 TIME FORMAL FELON.  I AM THE ONLY ONE I HAVE EVER MET THAT CAN SAY THAT.  HOW MANY OF THIS TYPE CAN YOU SAY YOU HAVE EVER MET?  I HAVE TO TAKE SOME REALLY STRONG MEDS AND HAVE MORE THAN ENOUGH TO STAY GOOD AND FUCKED UP FOR ABOUT A YEAR BUT I HAVE CHOSEN A DIFFERENT PATH FOR MYSELF-I HAVE CHOSEN CLARITY OF MIND THAT I DO NOT THINK I HAVE EVER HAD.  AND SINCE ADULT PROTECTIVE SERVICES GOT ME MY NEW GLASSES- I SEE THINGS WITH A CLARITY I NEVER COULD HAVE IMAGINED.   SURE- I AM BEING FOLLOWED AND TERRORISED REGULARLY BY A PACK OF CRIMINALS ASSOCIATED WITH MICHAEL SHURER AND HIS AUDIO AND VIDEO BUSINESS, SURE I NOT A FRIEND TO TURN TO WHEN I GET LONELY,. SURE -ALL I GOT IS AN OLD TORE BACK RV TO CALL A HOME-BUT I HAVE HAD IT MUCH WORSE AND SEEN PEOPLE IN HARD PLACES THEY ARE IN OF THEIR OWN CHOOSING-  BUT NOW I THINK I CAN START TO CELEBRATE THIS ‘THANKSGIVING’ HOLIDAY THAT I NEVER REALLY UNDERSTOOD OR HAD THE FAMILY REQUIRED FOR IT.   I HAVE SOME MENTAL ISSUES-DON’T WE ALL?  BUT AT THE VERY LEAST I AM THANKFUL FOR TURNING INTO THE PERSON I AM NOW.  YOU WOULD NOT EVEN HAVE RECOGNIZED ME HAD YOU SEEN ME 10-12 YEARS AGO.  AS FOR THIS WHOLE CHRISTMAS THING-IT DISGUSTS ME.  ALL THESE PEOPLE WHO ARE OH SO MATERIALISTIC OUT BUYING ALL THE TRASH AND KILLING PINE TREES-I SAW THE LIFELESS BODY OF ONE OF THOSE PINES THIS MORNING-I ASKED IF THEY HAD CUT IT DOWN THEMSELVES, TO WHICH THEY REPLIED ‘YES’   MY ADVICE FOR THIS FAMILY WAS TO FIND A TALLER TREE NEXT YEAR AND CUT THE TOP 5 OR 6 FEET OFF AND THE TREE WILL SEND UP ITS TIPS FROM THE HIGHEST BRANCHES AND YOU WILL HAVE ONLY DAMAGED A TREE INSTEAD OF KILLING ONE-I NEVER GOT MUCH OF A CHRISTMAS DUE TO ME BEING A FOSTER CHILD AND THANKSGIVING WAS ALWAYS A HORROR STORY FOR ME, BUT THIS YEAR I THINK I AM STARTING TO UNDERSTAND THE MEANING OF THANKSGIVING IN MY LIFE.  DO NOT FEEL SORRY FOR ME-WE ALL HAVE DIFFERENT UPBRINGINGS THAT PRODUCE DIFFERENT KINDS OF PEOPLE- BE THANKFUL YOU ARE ABLE TO COMPREHEND WHAT THERE IS TO BE THANKFUL FOR.  THERAPUTIC WRITING DONE BY KARIN WRAPE 11-16-16-I W3ONDER WHAT I WILL WRITE NEXT YEAR WHEN THESE ‘FAMILY’ HOLIDAYS ARE AGAIN UPON US…

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